3 Ways to Be Miserable and Unbearable

Strategies on how to be successful are interesting. They’re necessary and useful. But they are also insufficient.

If you truly want to be successful you need to know what not to do. For instance it helps to know that playing the lottery is probably a bad outcome if you want to achieve long-term sustained financial success.

That is why today we are going to look at some of the things that you don’t want to do, if you want to be successful.

Let’s look at 3 ways way to be absolutely miserable.

Here’s number 1

Explain away your failures

We all fail from time to time. The good thing about failure is that it teaches us what not to do. The only way failing is bad, is if we blame it on others. If we imagine that someone or something else is at the root of our problems. Sometimes our failures is not our own fault, but that doesn’t matter.

If we really want to be miserable however, it is a very good strategy to blame all of your failures on others. Come up with every possible explanation as to who let you down, and what happened that caused you to fail. In this way, you make sure that you never learn anything, and never improve in any meaningful way. This way you start to cultivate a feeling of helplessness and you start to think that the world is out to get you.

This is a very effective strategy to make yourself miserable in life.

If you want to be successful on the other hand, you need to take ownership of your failures. Embrace failure, and learn from every single one. Ask as many questions as you can of yourself and others, as to just what caused you to fail and how you can improve so it won’t happen again.

You must cultivate a rock-solid belief that your destiny is in your own hands, and that you are the captain of your ship, so whatever happens — whether you run aground or reach the promised land — it is because of your command.

Every failure holds a lesson, and the more you can learn from failure, the better you will become. And the better you become, the less miserable and more successful you will be.

But you probably already knew that.

Be a victim

When you think of yourself as a victim — of racism, sexism, the government or whatever else you might be a victim of — you become powerless. When you feel powerless, you act powerless. When you act powerless you are sure to be miserable.

There are many ways to become a victim. The world can be a dark place, and there are many people who want to hurt you if you let them. One of the best ways to do that is to let yourself become a victim. If you think that everything that happened in the past determines your future you will be miserable.

If you don’t want to be miserable however — do the opposite. Think in terms of what you can do. How you can take charge. Take the power back. You can focus on what you can control. What you can do to improve your outcomes. When you think in terms of the things you can do, the things you can change and the things you can control, you take the power. You are the one in charge, and the feeling of being powerful, that you master your fate, charges you up.

You can do wonderful things when you take control. When you take charge. When you are charged up.

But you probably already knew that.

Be Pessimistic

Another strategy that is certain to make you miserable, is to imagine the worst possible outcomes all the time. The bigger, darker and more looming you can make all of the possible dangers on the horizon, the more miserable you will be. You know that things are bound to get worse and you act accordingly.

A pessimistic mind-set is a surefire way to misery. The more pessimistic you are, the worse you’ll feel, because your pessimism impacts your mood, your body and your brain. The more trouble you can imagine in the future the worse your life will be. Misery wil be guaranteed.

Another part of this strategy is to spread your pessimism to other people and infect them with it. This ensure that every interaction you have is dark and sad and you will reach a great level of misery.

You will be absolutely miserable, everyone around you will be miserable and every interaction you have will have a miserable outcome.

Pessimism is a great strategy for being miserable.

If you would rather be successful, happy and non-miserable, the best thing you can do is to be optimistic. To be a person who spreads joy. Who believes that things will get better. Who believes that fate is in your own hands.

Smiling at people and engaging them with your positive attitude is a great way to feel happy. To feel like you can make a difference. To feel that your life matters, and that you make the world a better place.

Optimism get things done. And being optimistic is completely within your control. All you have to do is smile at the people around you.

When you smile you start thinking more positive thoughts. And when you think more positive thoughts, you start feeling better about yourself and others.

When you start feeling better about yourself and others you will start to have more positive interactions. People around you will smile and be optimistic as well. This affects the nature of your interactions which will be better, and so your life takes on an upwards trajectory.

You will feel better, be better and everyone around you will be better off.

But you probably already knew that.